EXCLUSIVE: SARA EVANS' CHEATING ACCUSATIONS CAUSE ANOREXIA RELAPSE

While country singer Sara Evans and estranged husband Craig Schelske squared off in a bitter divorce court proceeding in Franklin, Tenn., on Oct. 26, their former nanny, Alison Clinton, 28, whom Sara has accused of sleeping with her husband, was in an even bigger fight — for her life.

But she's not giving up. Alison sat down with Star's Shira Levine at Nashville's Baptist Hospital before a third round of tests for her relapsed anorexia. Alison talked candidly about the damage Sara's accusations have done to her reputation, her friendships and her health — and what she's doing to fight back.

How is your mental and physical health today?
I feel like I am almost at my breaking point. I am really tired and trying to deal with my health and all that is going on. I am trying to separate all what's going on with Sara and Craig and just deal with myself.

You must feel really betrayed by Sara.
Absolutely. This is devastating. I refer to this as like a death. One day — the Wednesday that I last talked to Sara — we were best friends, and the next day, she filed these allegations against me.

Looking back now, did you see this coming?
Not a clue. It was a wonderful girly conversation. It was "I love you. I miss you. When you coming up to L.A. to see me on Dancing With the Stars?" She had been asking me to come out there for weeks. I had already booked a ticket a couple weeks before and had to cancel because of doctor's appointments. [And then] the very next day is when these allegations came out. It just didn't make any sense.

You were reported to be down to 79 pounds, and previously, you weighed 69 pounds Where is your weight now?
Sixty-nine was my worst. I'm not far away from that. Losing four pounds in a week is not doing too good. Having to eat on top of this — I don't have an appetite when I'm upset. It's really horrible. I'm dealing with the loss of a friend, false allegations, trying to restore my health, trying to regain my name. I have no job, and I'm a newlywed so it's a lot on my plate. Plus my brothers are off going to war so there is just so much. They're Air Force. They're both out defending our country. So it's like, where do I start?

What are the current stats on your weight, your heart and your potassium levels?
I've lost weight. I'm struggling. This is an outpatient program for anorexia. I was meeting with my doctor and my therapist. My heart is in the right place and I am focused mentally. I've got a great support system. But I'm not doing well at all. I can't control how my heart is, I just can try to do the best that I can each day with each meal. This is affecting me pretty hard. It's an everyday thing. For me, I have to deal with this meal to meal.

What triggered your anorexia originally?
It started when I went with Sara out on a promotional radio tour [in August 2003]. I had gained a little weight and I was trying to lose it, and I went overboard. Being on the road it's hard to control much of anything. So that was kind of where I focused my control issues. That was the only thing I could really control — how much food I took in.

Why is she doing this to you? What do you think is her explanation?
I don't know. That's why it's so hard [and] why I can't get past it. It just doesn't make any sense. Both she and Craig are very private people. So for them to air their dirty laundry, in a way, that is just bizarre.

Sara's lawyers say they have illicit photos of you and Craig .
It will come out that it's not true. [People will see] something that is not me, and it doesn't sound like it is Craig either. But I'm not worried about it. I know that I would never do anything like that. Sara knows that I would never do anything like that. I very much love my husband. I'm just not like that. I am a very private person, and that's just not my style. I love Sara and I love Craig, and I would never do anything to harm their relationship or hurt my friendship with them. Anybody who knows me, knows I am loyal to the death.

What do you think about what your lawyer told you about today's court hearing?
Oh, it is humiliating. First of all, I don't want to talk about sex. I understand that is human nature to hear one side of the story and close your mind off, but if I could say anything to the public, it is realize there are two sides to the story. I'm a good person. Give me a shot. Yeah she is a superstar, a celebrity, and I am this regular peon. It doesn't make her any better than me and it doesn't mean her word is the truth. I just ask people to read Star and read the article with an open mind. This is my side of the story.

Have you heard from Craig? Did he call to say he was sorry?
Craig called me and he cried. He was like, "I'm so sorry this is happening to you, that you and your husband are getting dragged into this." He's been so good to Sara and so loyal to her. For her to do this is so shaming and awful. He called my husband that Sunday after everything came out and just wanted to see how we were doing. Craig is just a good guy. My husband and he are really good friends.

So are you guys still in touch with Craig?
No, no we're not. But you know when I very first found out about this — I've never told anyone this — Craig said, "You can have [your husband] Chris call me. If he wants to talk about it, if he wants, I will look that man in the eye and shake his hand." I went home and told him that. I said, "You know honey if you want to talk to Craig, he'll talk to you." Chris said, "Alison, I know the truth. I know Craig, and I know you, and neither one of you would do this." Chris has never had to talk to Craig because he just knows. I know who I am. My family knows who I am. That's what matters. I am a firm believer that the truth will come out.

I read that Craig says she has changed so much in the last year.
Well, yeah sure. But at the same time I changed, and she didn't give up on me. I loved Sara. I mean I still love her.

If you could talk to Sara right now what would you say?
That I love her and that I am praying for her. My family still loves and supports her. This is crushing. My family is going through a divorce right now — my parents are. So I know that she is going through a lot of pain. I wish that she would step back from all of this and reevaluate who she is because this is not her style, this is not her way. If she could do that, if she would come and say, "OK, I was wrong."

And then you would reconcile with her?
I don't know if there is ever a place to salvage our friendship just because I would never trust anybody who would do this to me again. If I did this to someone I wouldn't expect them to trust or ever forgive me. But she is a good person with a good heart. I wish she could just go back to that and focus on that.

You must really miss those kids.
I loved those kids. I just wish we could go back to three weeks ago. It was perfect. I had a great job. I was still friends with my best friend. I was in love with my husband, playing with my puppy. It was football season and now — nothing.

She was also helping your career in music, so this put that on hold?
Yeah. Clearly. We've got to take it one day at a time. My goal wasn't to come out and get publicity; my goal was to clear my name. That is my priority. First and foremost my name has got to be retracted. The public will know the truth. I'm still going to go on with my career. I moved here. I am open to suggestions right now. People have expressed interest. I'm not going to let somebody's insecurities and false accusations ruin my chances or my hope. I'm a fighter, so bring it!

How was taking the lie detector test?
That was the most traumatic, scary and exhausting experience that I've ever [had] in my life. It was weird.

Do you think Craig was involved with any other women or pornography? Do you believe Sara had an affair with Kenny Chesney? Does any of this make sense now?
None if this sounds like any of them. All of it sounds ridiculous. It's all salacious. It's all been hyped up in the media. It's like someone is pulling stuff out, and the next person has to pull their gun. It's just "Stop, put the guns down and divorce if that's what you want to do." Stop slinging mud. Those kids are going to grow up hearing those stories. All we want is for her to apologize now. If she did she would feel so much better. It's a lie. She knows it is. So come out and say it.

Sara and the kids were all in your wedding, right?
She performed at my wedding. She was my sister. She was my soul mate. From one day to the next, I still can't believe this is my reality. It's fine because that was our day. I'm not going to look at it as ruined. It wasn't — it was perfect. I loved her, she was my best friend. That won't be tainted. It's the little memories; it's like a boyfriend. I can't heal yet until there's a reason why this has happened. There is no closure. I can't heal my wound until I know what the cause of this was.

Are you still watching Dancing With The Stars?
No. Oh, my god, I was before. But now I can't watch it anymore. I will say "Go Emmitt Smith!" Because I am a huge Cowboys fan.